Monday, March 2, 2009

Ohhhhhh Kæeeeeeenədəəəəəəəəə

Our Home and Native Land
Archaeological evidence suggests humans began populating the Yukon approximately 26,500 years from today.  Drenched in dried seal and fox furs, these nomads most likely drew south upon tiring of the harsh winters, and most gladly discovered the southern regions, with evidence suggesting Ontario a likely settling ground some 950 decades ago.   As Utopias continued to be discovered, the nomads turned to settling.  Finding havens of great caribou migrations and free flowing rivers...  The Natives were Home - Our Land.

True Patriot Love in All Thy Sons Command
The catholic reach of the first Europeans first began finding paydirt and plunder by the Purple People Eaters some 40 generations back - built by broad boards and bosomed backs, more soon followed, but this time by blessed, baptized servants of the King or Queen - true patriots of love commanded by the Fatherland or Motherland as if the son was truly blessed.  Cabot, Cartier, de Champlain all paid homage to Our Home and Native's Land in the Parks.   

With Glowing Hearts We See The Rise
"sacre bleu!  L'Anglais, l'Anglais!!! Stupid tete de merde - ne savant rien de nos reglement - savages...."

The 7 year war lasted 7 years.   The British Empire were in stark embattlement with the French and various American Indian, or Natives who called the Land Home.  In 1763, the Treaty of Paris was proclaimed.  In the treaty, Marquis de Vaudreuil surrendered control of all the lands to the British Empire.   Through dominance and tales of prosperity, the British Empire grew -  and the Native's Lands were no longer theirs - they sought refuge where they could, and where they couldn't, they were sacrificed to the British Gods - as if the Mayans taught the Spanish, British and all inquisitors a valuable lesson - take what you want without regard.  And even as the concepts of blind greed were being seeded in the minds of the White Man, the Revolution happened - a tale of freedom, of prosperity, and of greed - the United States grew a pair of cojones.  

The True North Strong and Free
Confederated in 1867, or as defined by as to be "united in a league, alliance or conspiracy", the Great True North grew Strong and Free - free from the shackles of Europe, free to roam the vast country and terrain - everybody got a piece of the pie - heck even the de Champlain was granted harvest with a vast northern province.  The Country grew, gave graces to the Queen and God and prospered with our kid sister, the Unites States.  Honour to the great stories of the Natives grew everywhere - Toronto - Ottawa - Winnipeg - Oshawa... 

From Far and Wide We Stand On Guard for Thee
Entering a war must drive even the greatest of leaders into a quarry - what are the benefits - what are the risks - will I need to sacrifice my sons?  will the benefit outweigh the guilt on the mother's shoulders? does the milk really taste that sour?  When World War I began, from far and wide, we stood on guard for Britain, and when war was declared, we automatically got involved - no questions asked - no guts no glory, no ask no sorry, no details no story, no honour so sorry... 

God Keep Our Land Glorious and Free

It was released today that Canada has officially entered into a recession period.  And the Bite Bit Hard.  As if masking away tales of prosperity with a cheap band-aid, the leaders of this country declared a state of non-emergency in the months of October and November of 2008.  Everything was cool, everything was calm, everything was o.k.  It is now close to three spins since the shake around the Sun, and the number finally came in.  The Great Impervious Country of Canada lost 3.4% of it's drive, it's GDP during the months that the campaigns to elect a leader spoke of prosperity, strength, the tar sands, and the truth.  And even during the worst possible month of the year, December, the country hid behind a tale of treachery and trickery that needed the Queen Mum to intervene.  The 3.4% translates to $16 billion buck eyed loonies getting caught in the head lights and disappearing.  It has also meant that the nation has realized the tattled tales of truth were misleading - the TSX shrank 6% - a sum of money I can't bother to equate - perhaps in the Billions of bubbled buck eyed loonie tunes.  

Oh Kaenedah We Stand on Guard for Thee 
We're faced with a crunch now - one that some knew were coming, one that the politicians kept denying, and one your mortgage broker kept trying and selling.  The Queen isn't coming to save you on this one - keep sucking your thumb and crying - Mum ain't comin.  The US has somehow managed to cut the umbilical cord, but then again, it may have been a premature circumcision that caused it to act like a mis-behaven little snot-nosed troublemakers that always steals lighters from the 'adult'  tables at picnics... Canada still suckles the teet of the twat, milking its slow decline into the global recession catalyzed by the entropic nature of greed and capitalistic intentions... Does the milk taste sour enough to spit out yet?  It may just turn in the next few months...  Time to spit... Time to pick a new kool-aid flavour...  

I can't believe I can't insert the Canadian Coat of Arms into this homage, the decades-old copywrite is protected by the Crown Corporation.

1 comment:

  1. RBC Bank President Gordon Nixon - Salary $11.73 Million


    I'm a commercial fisherman fighting the Royal Bank of Canada (RBC Bank) over a $100,000 loan mistake. I lost my home, fishing vessel and equipment. Help me fight this corporate bully by closing your RBC Bank account.

    There was no monthly interest payment date or amount of interest payable per month on my loan agreement. Date of first installment payment (Principal + interest) is approximately 1 year from the signing of my contract.
    Demand loan agreements signed by other fishermen around the same time disclosed monthly interest payment dates and interest amounts payable per month.The lending policy for fishermen did change at RBC from one payment (principal + interest) per year for fishing loans to principal paid yearly with interest paid monthly. This lending practice was in place when I approached RBC.
    Only problem is the loans officer was a replacement who wasn't familiar with these type of loans. She never informed me verbally or in writing about this new criteria.

    Phone or e-mail:
    RBC President, Gordon Nixon, Toronto (416)974-6415
    RBC Vice President, Sales, Anne Lockie, Toronto (416)974-6821
    RBC President, Atlantic Provinces, Greg Grice (902)421-8112 mail
    RBC Manager, Cape Breton/Eastern Nova Scotia, Jerry Rankin (902)567-8600
    RBC Vice President, Atlantic Provinces, Brian Conway (902)491-4302 mail
    RBC Vice President, Halifax Region, Tammy Holland (902)421-8112 mail
    RBC Senior Manager, Media & Public Relations, Beja Rodeck (416)974-5506 mail
    RBC Ombudsman, Wendy Knight, Toronto, Ontario 1-800-769-2542 mail
    Ombudsman for Banking Services & Investments, JoAnne Olafson, Toronto, 1-888-451-4519 mail

    "Fighting the Royal Bank of Canada (RBC Bank) one customer at a time"